April 14, 2022 232 dvomi

How is the living with medical students?

Facultas nostra 2022, April

Everyone who has the “luck” to have a medical student – medic – friend or even lives with one, will realize, in time, that this cohabitation brings many responsibilities with it, and not all are pleasant to a human. Actually, none is.

Surely, medics are still just ordinary students… But I think that after all, only those who have had the experience of living with a medic for a while will certainly find themselves in the following lines of the list of (bad) habits. 

1. Talking about really disgusting things, especially during meals 

Chronic sunburn from the white walls of hospitals is probably to blame, but it seems as if medics have long since forgotten what things can be discussed in the company of other people and when it is really improper. It may happen that during the meal, when you are having spaghetti for lunch, you will hear about experiences from autopsies regarding the consistency of the intestines. The medic will then easily compare the hot chocolate to something they saw at the ward today while changing a patient’s diapers. 

2. Frequent upkeep/living at the dumpsite 

Unfortunately, what stage your home will be in depends only on what stage of the examinations period the medic is at. If there is some Friday or so left before the exam, you will have your home tidy like never before. The medic will furiously clean up every speck, just to find an excuse why not to study. If you ask them to pick over the peas, he will gladly jump after such an opportunity to procrastinate. But alas if the medic has a few days before the test and you are trying to carefully indicate that the almost moldy dishes lying in the sink for some time would need to be washed already. Or that for a person to stay close to a constantly sweating medic, it would be enough if he did not forget to wash him or herself at least once a day. Usually, however, your wishes will come true always after the exams ... Until then, you have to get a clothespin for your nose. 

3. The feeling that the medic is the worst off in the world, and you have to appreciate your beautiful life 

This is something that a medic can arouse in you in almost a second. All you have to do is fail to escape the hour-long lecture as to why did the medic had to apply for the medical school, how everything in their life is good for nothing, how much they still have to learn, and all the things they’d do if they weren’t a medic. If you are trying to find a pinch of understanding in yourself and suggest that they can always drop out of medicine, the medic looks at you as if you’d gone crazy. Why would he or she do that? 

4. Sleep at an unusual hour of the day 

There is not an hour, day, or a minute during a day when a medic would not despise the opportunity to go to sleep immediately. And that is wherever. While during the day you are walking on the tips of your toes around them, at night after you return from a party you can find that the medic’s room is still lit. But alas to you to drop a pin and draw them away from their vigilance above the Čiháks (the infamous textbooks of anatomy). It could also happen that you do not avoid repeating the 3rd point. 

5. Offering often unrequested health care advice 

Do you wish to quickly fall ill from any malignant disease in a few minutes? Then be sure to live with a medic. Not only you will always have a free exam, but also a pressing diagnosis for the rest of your life. Which, however, according to the medic does not have to last that long. This know-it-all can actually turn any sore throat into a possibly incurable disease, which is 99% fatal. Therefore, you should go see a doctor for it or dig a grave for yourself straight away. But they always add that there is no need to panic. He or she has gotten sick with a similar disease last year and is still among us. Unfortunately so, because at this moment you would wish for the exact opposite… 

6. Using words you don’t know 

-osis, -itis, -opsia – while you are catching only the suffixes, the medic spews out words that sound like some encyclopedia mumbo-jumbo whenever they can. It is as if someone had installed a generator of the craziest words into their head, and there is no button that would manage to turn it off. With a smile and a sympathetic look, however, you will save your reputation. Nonetheless, if you want to make the medic happy, let him explain the word to you in a few minutes-long lecture. 

7. Excuses for the constant lack of time 

Do you want to take a medic shopping? They don’t have time; they have to study. And what about coffee? Maybe tomorrow? It doesn't work either, there is a credit test on Friday, they must study. And how about any other time, anytime? Well, you know, they don’t have time either. You know how it goes… 

8. Emotional swings for which a mother in her 8th month of pregnancy could not be ashamed for 

Unfortunately, with the emotions of a medic, it’s like on a rollercoaster. And unfortunately, you never know if they’re now up or down. It may happen that in case of an inappropriate remark, such as how nice of a day it is outside, the medic burst into uncontrolled crying because they have not been outside for several days. On the contrary, on the day when your hamster dies, you simply do not explain your grief to the medic, because they must rejoice right now, as they have passed an exam yesterday. Ahh those medics… 

9. A request to provide your body as an educational specimen 

At this point, be very careful how far you want to go. It starts off inconspicuously. The medic needs to practice physical examination on someone, so why not. The medic needs to try a neurological test on someone. Well, ok then. The medic would like to examine your child. All right then, you can still take that. The medic would like you to donate your body to science for research after your death. Well, even that could be understood, but the fact that the medic wants to operate out your kidney, that seems a little too much to you… 

10. WARNING! It is contagious 

Whether you like it or not, the longer you live with a medic, the more they get under your skin. You understand them more because of this, and as if that wasn’t enough you learn more and more of the mentioned bad habits from them. It’s like an infection disease which you’ll catch sooner or later.

And so, over time, you scare your friends with stories about the festering pimples that the medic told you about after their dermatology class.

The mentioned dishes in the sink can stay there a week longer… And the hypophysis is after all a pituitary gland!

If you are experiencing one of these symptoms, you should quickly think about evacuating the apartment. Or about an application to study medicine.